To relax my mind... (Eric Sermon)

Vacation...It a wonderful thing. I often wonder how life would be if you never had time off. I have been working non-stop since Janurary, maybe a couple of days here and there. But I never knew how tired I was until this week, unitl I stopped. AND I enjoy being lazy. Too bad i cant be, too many mouths to feed and bills to pay, spoiled grown woman to maintain... ;)

"So I can be free!"

Just in case tomorrow never comes, there is something you should know. (Usher)

Its amazing how quickly life can change. One minute you are here the next you are gone. One of my co-workers passed away last week. Young black guy. wife. 2 little boys. good man. doing the right thing- dead. Its puzzling- death i mean. I think we all see it as something thats far away, something that will not happen now. But then it does and we struggle to get our minds, hands, arms around this terrible fact-of-life. Death. I saw him Friday. We talked about the plan for Line 40, 15 packs. I called him Friday night 11:30 pm. Just to see how it went. He sent and email and had video. And he was gone Saturday, before the sunset. How is that possible, and I just him. The memory is still very vivid. I see him walking... and laughing... and telling his side of the story. Mr. Storey. I remember you. I remember the last thing you said to me... "I got your back." I will never forget. I never forget to cherish this day, each day. Cool Dude. Good Guy. I will pray for your family. your wife. Justin and Will. I will pray for mom. and I will ALWAYS remember you. .... "I've given you every bit of the man I am."

He said turn 68, you'll re-negotiate...(J.Mayer)

I went to see my father today. He has been in the hospital for 3 days, and doing much better now I think. But this was strange for me...

All my life I have never know my dad to be sick. Never seen him in the hopital, never seen anything more than the flu. I know he isn't invincible but I guess I never let my mind go to the fact he may fall ill one day. I saw him a man today. Human. and it was strange for me to see this man I love in this condition.

He is interesting. Different. Hard. And his mouth.... i have his mouth. He can say some of the most hurtfull thing. And he can make me feel like a little girl and i know my weakness my lack of confidence. all of those things i see when he is around. i can do the same. He drives the nurse crazy. I think she wants to kick his ass. lol.

but this was different. hard to explain. and i guess all thats let to ask.... God- watch over my dada.

... don't stop this train.

Its been a long time, I shouldn't have left you... (Timberland)

Its amazing how times flies and I only seem to remember that when i reminise on the past. I looked back on this blog from Nov 2010 and I think about all that has transpired since. How quickly one can go from confident to arrogant to humbled. How quickly like can lift us up, and people can bring you down. It happens in a matter of moments when you look at the big picture.

I have a cigar upstairs. I was suppose to smoke it on new years but instead I slept. I was suppose to smoke it when I go my promotion but then my high got deflated. And I keep think... this is a cigar is for enjoyment and celebration and yet it has sat on the window seal for a month. And I have had so many triumphs.... but there it sits. Ummm...Life is what you make it....

SMOKE ONE with ya boy! (a. david)